


Move Heaven and Earth For You.

by Just_a_bunch_of_fandoms



Series: Natasha and AoS [1]
Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Additional Warnings In Author's Note, BAMF Bucky Barnes, BAMF Jemma Simmons, BAMF Natasha Romanov, Found Family, I'm not entirely sure what that tag means, Jemma Simmons Needs a Hug, Maria Hill is a Good Bro, Multi, Natasha Romanov Feels, Natasha Romanov Is Not A Robot, Natasha Romanov Needs a Hug, Natasha Romanov-centric, Papa Coulson, Protective Melinda May, Red Room (Marvel), Updates weekly!, but we're using it anyway, mama may, the Red Room Sucks
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-18
Updated: 2021-03-11
Packaged: 2021-03-13 23:14:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,247
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29533920
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Just_a_bunch_of_fandoms/pseuds/Just_a_bunch_of_fandoms
Summary: “She’s out there, Maria.”“Your sister?”“I have to find her. I need a team.”When Natasha Romanoff finds out that her family may have survived the bomb that had destroyed the Red Room, she has only one thought: Find them.She enlists the help of Maria Hill, Sharon Carter and a team that can help her, but it’s not that simple: Coulson’s alive, and lied to her, relationships of all kind are much harder to keep than they seem, History can be a curse and Yelena might not be the same person that Natasha had left her as.When secrets are revealed in the worst way and Simmons is taken by the surviving members of the Red Room, Daisy makes a note to never, ever, under any circumstances, land herself under the angry gaze of Natasha Romanoff.
Relationships: Bobbi Morse & Natasha Romanov, James "Bucky" Barnes & Natasha Romanov, James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers, Lance Hunter/Bobbi Morse, Leo Fitz & Jemma Simmons & Skye | Daisy Johnson, Leo Fitz/Jemma Simmons, Maria Hill & Natasha Romanov, Melinda May & Natasha Romanov, Natasha Romanov & Alexei Shostakov | Alexi Shostakov, Natasha Romanov & Jemma Simmons, Natasha Romanov & Melina Vostokoff, Phil Coulson & Melinda May, Phil Coulson & Natasha Romanov, Steve Rogers & Natasha Romanov, Steve Rogers/Natasha Romanov, Yelena Belova & Natasha Romanov
Series: Natasha and AoS [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2169768
Comments: 14
Kudos: 57





	1. Chapter One.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone! I’m so, so, so excited to write this fic! I’ve been planning it for years it seems - it has not actually been years, just like, a month at most, bUT -  
> Right, some backstory:  
> Timelines:  
> For Natasha: It’s set after AoU where everyone is happy and a family.  
> Natasha is very close with Wanda and is very maternal towards her and they have a sister/sister, mother/daughter bond.  
> She does not know that Coulson is alive. This is very important! To her, Coulson has been dead since 2012, this is set roughly during 2015, so three years for Nat (and Clint) believing Coulson to be dead.  
> What? I didn’t say this wouldn’t have angst.  
> Also, Bucky was found after TWS and is cleared of the trigger words by this point. You’ll see why this is relevant soon. ;)  
> For AoS:  
> Right, this has taken me a bit of time to work out where Nat can fit.  
> So - Massive spoilers, please go away if you haven’t seen season 2!!!  
> This is set just after season 2.  
> It has canon characters in season 2 (FitzSimmons, May, Coulson, Mack, Hunter, Bobbi and Skye/Daisy).  
> However, this is before season 3 has started and will diverge from canon from then.  
> Simmons did not get swallowed up by the monolith. I don’t even know what that is.  
> Nope, she and Fitz went on their date and got together (Jesus, finally!).  
> Coulson is the director. Not much change on Mack and Hunter tbh.  
> And Skye/Daisy, I’ve been thinking about her and whether to have her in this story as Daisy and Skye, so here’s what I’m going to do:  
> Her name is Daisy, if you don’t have a clue of what I’m on about, you need to leave now. In this fic I will not be filtering spoilers, I have warned you.  
> Anyway! Her name is Daisy and she does have her powers, but she’s just getting used to them, so will not be using them often.  
> Oh! Also, May did not go on holiday with Andrew thank you very much.  
> In addition, Bobbi is in Rehab, but wasn’t hurt as badly as she was in the series, so is allowed to be much more active.  
> Next point:  
> The Red Room and other relationships will be based on my own assumptions of certain characters’ pasts.  
> Warning:  
> This fic will be dealing with very serious topics. Most of it is implied and even so, I’ll put a warning at the beginning of the chapter, but if you are easily triggered by things like abuse, don’t read this.  
> Natasha’s history won’t be exactly accurate - I know that canonically speaking the leader of the Red Room was Ivan Somodorov (I think? Or Dreykov? Whatever, it’s one of them), but he’s not in this fic, the leader is my OC.  
> Um, I think that’s it.  
> Enjoy!

Natasha was in her bedroom, absent-mindfully scrolling through messages exchanged with her and Laura Barton about their lunch meeting today when her computer beeped. 

Natasha dropped her phone and her hands went shakily to her mouth.

It never beeped.

Had been programmed not to.

Unless...unless...oh  _ God. _

She sprang off her bed and ran to her computer, typing in a few codes to get a closer look.

It showed her heat signatures.

From Russia.

From Moscow.

Where she’d been trained.

And there were heat signatures. 

In a building near the collapsed remains of the Red Room where she’d spent most of her time. 

There were survivors of the Red Room.

There were  _ survivors _ of the Red Room. 

Yelena.

She could be alive.

She could be out there. 

Oh, God.

Oh, God.

She was  _ alive. _

Two hours later, her phone buzzed from its place on the floor when Natasha had dropped it.

Natasha ignored it and remained focused on the red and orange shapes on the screen. 

Her phone buzzed more persistently and FRIDAY said politely. “Ms Romanoff, your phone is going off. Shall I answer it for you?”

Natasha didn’t answer; she was so fixated on the screen.

“Ms Romanoff?” FRIDAY repeated. “Your phone is ringing. It’s Laura Barton, shall I put her through?”

“Laura?” Natasha tore her gaze away from her screen. “Uhh, yeah, I’m getting my phone.” Natasha ungracefully slid herself off the chair, trying to watch the screen for as long as possible, before sliding out a leg and pulling the still-ringing phone towards her with her foot. 

“Laura, what’s up?” She answered, pulling herself back up on the table to watch the computer screen once more. 

“Nat, are you on your way?” Laura asked, the smile evident in her voice. 

_ Uh oh _ “On my way…?”   
“Yes.”   
“I’m sorry, am I -”   
“Nat, we’re having lunch remember? That’s today. Are you still coming?” Laura reminded her, exasperated. 

“Oh, I…” Natasha’s gaze went to the flickering computer screen. “I can’t.”   
“You can’t?”   
“Yes.”   
“Why not?” Laura definitely had her ‘disapproving face’ on. 

“She’s…” Natasha swallowed, took a deep breath and when she spoke again, her voice trembled. “She’s alive, Laura.”   
Silence. Then, “Oh my God. You’re sure?” Laura’s voice was barely a whisper, matching Natasha’s. 

“My computer alerted me of movement in Moscow. I think it’s her.” Natasha didn’t make an effort to stop her tears falling. 

“And your parents?” Laura’s voice was soft.

“I-” Natasha hadn’t thought that far - her parents hadn’t been with her like Yelena had when the building had collapsed, but, if they had been in the building and they had managed to escape or manage to get to the bomb shelter in time… “Do  _ you  _ think they’re still out there?” She asked, her voice trembling slightly. 

Laura answered instantly, “Yeah. Oh,  _ Nat.  _ Don’t worry about lunch, we’ll find another time. Find them, Tash.”   
Natasha was shaking all over, but determination spurned through her. They were out there. Her parents, her little sister. They were out there.

She was going to find them.

Because she’d be damned if she let them go again. 

Natasha’s fingers skimmed over her contacts on her phone until it rested on Maria Hill’s. 

If she was to find her sister, then she had to think rationally. She needed a team to help. If Yelena was alive, it was very likely that she wasn’t the only member from the Red Room still alive and Natasha would need help - especially if  _ leaders _ of the Red Room had survived.

And she was betting that Maria knew just the right people. 

“Maria? Hi.” Natasha said, once her friend had answered the phone. “I need your help.”

“Oh yeah?” Came her friend’s reply. “What with?” 

“She’s out there. Maria, she’s alive.” Natasha’s hands found the arrow necklace Clint had given her and tightened her grip on it. 

“She’s - Yelena?” Maria sounded shocked. 

Natasha nodded, “And possibly my parents. Maria, I was wondering if you knew a team that could help me? Maybe some former SHIELD members? Please.”   
“Four hours, then meet me in the common room.” Maria ordered, then hung up. 

Natasha put her phone down on the floor, then clicked a few more buttons on her computer, revealing the image of a young girl - aged sixteen or so - with dirty blonde hair and blue-grey eyes and a wicked grin with a touch of mischief. 

Natasha pressed her forehead against the image. “I’m coming for you, Yelena. I never forgot about you. I’m coming for you. Hold on, маленькая звезда.  _ Hold on.” _ (Little star).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thoughts so far? There will be some backstory that I will dive further into, but I hope you enjoyed this one!
> 
> Updates will be every Thursday, and everything is already pre-written, so hopefully you won't have to wait long!


	2. Chapter Two.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We see the agents of shield, and Natasha gets a nasty surprise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all, um, thank you so much!!! 20 kudos and almost 200 views on the first chapter?? That is incredible and means so much to me, so thank you!!!  
> Secondly, I know the story is starting off a little slow, but I'm world building here, and I promise everything takes off soon! I just want to establish relationships and things like that.  
> With all that said, enjoy!

“You’re pacing. What’s up?”    
Coulson turned to face May, who’s face remained unimpressed at his nervous pacing. 

“I got a call from Maria.” 

May raised an eyebrow “Oh?”   
“She needs our help.”   
“Well, it wouldn’t be the first time.” May pointed out with a rare show of humour. 

“She was talking to Natasha. She needs our help. She thinks her sister is alive.”

May’s eyes widened. “What did you say?”   
“I’d said I’d help of course.”   
“Nat still thinks you’re dead.”   
“Yeah, I’m aware of that.” Coulson massaged his face with a hand.

“It’s time to come clean, Phil.” May told him, voice soft. “You can’t hide it from her forever. Who else is coming?”   
“Sharon Carter.” Coulson replied, his gut still churning with worry of Natasha’s reaction. 

In the old days at SHIELD, Natasha, Maria and Clint had become like daughters and a son to him, given Natasha’s already twisted past, he didn’t want to face her anger. 

“Phil?” May pressed, when he hadn’t spoken for a solid three minutes. 

“I’ll have to tell her.” Coulson repeated May’s words, despite the fact that he felt like running in the other direction. 

Before SHIELD had fallen, the younger agents would whisper that anyone who got on their SO’s bad side would have to face the Black Widow’s Wrath. Coulson used to laugh at them - Natasha wasn’t  _ that _ scary - but now realising that he might have to face her anger didn’t find it nearly as funny. 

“Yes.” May said, softly. 

“She’ll be mad.” Coulson stopped his pacing to face May where she was sitting on his desk. 

“Well, yes.” May said, unhelpfully. Coulson said as much to her, which she replied “What do you want me to say, Phil? She will be mad. You’ll just have to face the music.”

Coulson sighed and leant against the desk, his leg bouncing up and down nervously. It halted when May placed a gentle hand on his knee, calming him. He covered her hand with his own and looked at her.

May responded with a gentle squeeze of his hand. After a few moments of blissful silence, May stood up, “You’ll have to let the team know.” She said, “I assume they’re coming?”   
“We’ll need all the help we can get.” Coulson answered. 

“I’ll tell them to go to the Common Room. See you there in ten.” May said, disappearing out of the room. 

“So, how is it now that you’re finally together?” Daisy asked, staring at Jemma and wiggling her eyebrows. Jemma blushed slightly, but answered, “It’s great, Daisy. It’s really great.”   
“I’m glad.” Daisy said sincerely, “After everything you’ve both been through, you deserve to be happy.” She wasn’t lying; after Fitz had finally grown the confidence to ask out Simmons, they’d gotten together - about time agreed every member of the team, even May and Coulson - and Daisy couldn't be happier for her best friends. 

However, it did mean that Daisy third-wheeled an awful lot; Hunter and Bobbi, despite arguing ninety percent of the time, absolutely adored each other and FitzSimmons were adorable when they were together. 

It was sometimes too much. 

And May and Coulson, despite not seeing it, were pretty romantic with each other. Coulson was the only person Daisy had seen make May smile longer than one second and Coulson trusted May completely.

Daisy ended up being thrown with Mack a lot, which was fine. He was an easy person to be around and someone to complain to when the lovers got a bit too much.

“Daisy, Simmons.” May’s voice brought the two friends out of their conversation. “Coulson wants a word with us in the Common Room.”   
Daisy exchanged a look with Simmons,  _ “Another  _ mission?” She couldn’t quite keep the whine out of her voice. It had been a week since the whole Inhuman incident and the team could really use a break.

May gave her a fond smile, but snapped back to professional mode as quickly as it had come. “I’m afraid so. Maria called Coulson - I’ll let him explain in more detail - but long story short, she needs our help.”   
Daisy nodded, but Jemma’s eyes went wide. “Maria? As in Maria  _ Hill?” _

Daisy frowned. “What’s so special about her?”

Jemma shot her an unimpressed look. After it became clear that Daisy wasn’t going to say anything else, Jemma explained, “Agent Maria Hill. Former deputy director of SHIELD.” Daisy shrugged apologetically. “I’m sorry, I -”   
Simmons sighed loudly, “Good Lord, Daisy, it’s like you don’t know  _ anything.” _ _  
_ May hid a grin at Jemma’s childlike annoyance. “Come on.” She ordered and the two younger agents followed her. 

Daisy flopped onto a spare seat next to Mack since Jemma had immediately settled to sit next to Fitz and Daisy didn’t fancy being anywhere near those two. 

To her amusement, no one else was sitting next to the scientists.

Hunter and Bobbi were sat on the other end of the sofa, Bobbi propping her leg up on Hunter’s, while May hovered next to Coulson as he started to explain.

“I’ve had a call from Maria Hill on behalf of Natasha Romanoff -”   
Jemma’s gasp was audible and the team turned to face her. A hint of red spread across her cheeks. “Sorry.” She muttered. “But,  _ Natasha Romanoff, The Black Widow?  _ This is  _ amazing!  _ Isn’t this amazing!” She turned to Fitz, who nodded eagerly. 

Although, Daisy was pretty sure he would agree with anything Jemma said. 

“Anyway,” Coulson continued, with a look to the scientists. “It’s a missing persons case in some sense. Yelena Belova. Member of the Red Room. I’m sure Nat will be able to brief you better, but -”   
“Oh my God, you call The Black Widow  _ ‘Nat’” _ Jemma’s excited whisper cut across the room again.

“But until then,” Coulson seemed to be hiding a grin, “I want you to have hand-to-hand combat skills. May, I want you to go over training with Mack, Daisy, FitzSimmons and Hunter. Go over exercises with Bobbi too.”   
May nodded, but Daisy couldn’t help pointing out; “I’m already cleared for combat, Sir.”   
“I know.” Coulson recognised the question in her voice. “But the Red Room is incredibly dangerous. When Nat arrives with Maria and Agent Thirteen, they’ll be able to train you guys some more. Agent Thirteen is less commonly known as Sharon. Carter.” He added, just to see the BioChemist’s reaction once he’d caught sight of her excited look. 

It did not disappoint;   
It was like a little girl meeting Santa Claus.  _ “Carter?  _ Oh my God!  _ Peggy Carter’s niece _ - _ I’m  _ going to  _ meet Peggy Carter’s niece.” _ Jemma’s hands flew to her mouth. The BioChemist seemed to realise that everyone was staring at her and she shrugged self-consciously. “What?” She mumbled. “Agent Carter was the founder of SHIELD. Agent Thirteen was one of SHIELD’s best agents. It’s cool.”    
Fitz rubbed her arm fondly. “It’s very cool.” He said, humouring her. 

Jemma huffed at him, but before she could say anything, May spoke over her. “Daisy, Jemma and Bobbi, you three first. Mack, Hunter and Fitz, give us two hours.” With a jerk of her head, May walked out of the room, the other agents following her. 

“Thank you for coming.” Natasha couldn’t help saying again, despite practically hearing Maria’s eye roll from the pilot seat. 

Sharon Carter smiled at her. “My pleasure, Natasha.” 

Natasha hadn’t known Sharon Carter that well, but then SHIELD had fallen and Sharon had led SHIELD agents against Hydra and they had become allies of a sort. 

Maybe friends, but not in the same way that Maria or Clint was her friend. Sharon didn’t know the broken part of her that they knew. 

A part of her didn’t want to show her. 

To let the younger agent think that she was as untouchable as all the younger agents had thought she was. 

“We’re almost here.” Maria announced, flicking a few switches on the plane’s control system. 

“What’s with all the secrets, Maria?” Natasha called. “You may as well have blindfolded me.”   
“Oh, I’m going to.” Maria deadpanned. 

Natasha turned to Sharon, “You’ve been to this super-secret place before?”   
Sharon shook her head, “I’ve heard of it though.” 

“Huh.” Natasha fell silent after that - clearly the two other agents had decided on being cryptic.

Maria landed the plane in a landing site that housed many others. In the center of the large space, a huge plane was docked. 

Natasha whistled, nodding to the plane. “Impressive.”   
Maria gave her a small smile that didn’t quite meet her eyes. 

Maria led the other two women to two large yellow doors, which opened once Maria had scanned her card against the side of the door. 

There was another pair of doors that Maria slid her card against once more, revealing a corridor bustling with people rushing about or casually strolling down the hall. However, when Maria, Sharon and Natasha appeared at the top of the corridor, everyone froze and stared at the three legendary women. 

Maria walked ahead of Sharon and Natasha and spoke in a low voice to a young man, who motioned towards another room, then hesitantly turned to Natasha and Sharon, “Can I take your bags to some spare rooms?”   
Natasha shook her head, “Thanks, but we won’t be here long.” Her eyes darted around the hallway and finally rested on the large eagle symbol. 

Her lips tightened and she said to Maria, “Is there anywhere we can go...to talk?” To anyone else, her voice was light and friendly, but to Maria, the inflection on ‘talk’ was enough to give away her anger.

“Of course. The common room’s this way. Nat, Sharon, shall we?” Maria led them to the doors indicated and Natasha bit back her anger when she heard voices inside. 

The main speaker was a British woman, speaking very fast, “They’re almost here! Fitz, do I look fine? Oh, God, I can’t believe I’m going to meet Commander Hill, The Black Widow and Sharon Carter! I’m so excited!”   
“Simmons, you look fine.” Came another female voice. 

“Trust me,” Came a third -  _ very  _ familiar - female voice, “Nat really doesn’t care what you look like.” 

“Bobbi Morse, as I live and breathe. Thought I’d never see your ass again once SHIELD had fallen.” Natasha said, striding into the room. She frowned, noting the bandages “What the hell happened to you?”    
“It’s a long story.” Bobbi replied. Her gaze flicked to Maria for the briefest of moments, before getting up with a groan to give Natasha a hug. 

“I feel like I’ve missed a lot.” Natasha said and Bobbi’s smile dimmed slightly. 

“I’m being so rude, sorry!” Bobbi picked up her cheerful mask once more. “You remember Hunter, right?”   
Natasha gave him a small smile. 

“This is Mack, you know May and this is Daisy, Simmons and Fitz.” Bobbi introduced, pointing first to a tall, well-muscled man, then to May, who greeted Natasha with a nod and a rare smile, then to a young woman with short, cropped, black hair and lastly to two scientists - Natasha guessed, judging by their physical appearance - who seemed joined at the hip. 

“Guys, this is Maria Hill, Natasha Romanoff and Agent Thirteen or Sharon Carter.” 

“FitzSimmons, huh.” Natasha turned to the two agents. “I heard of you two years back. Is it still FitzSimmons or…?”

“Oh, it’s FitzSimmons, all right.” Daisy interjected as the couple blushed. “Mr and Mrs…”

_ “Daisy!”  _ Simmons hissed.

“I-it’s either, Ms Romanoff.” A very red Fitz replied. “I mean Coulson introduced us as FitzSimmons when we joined the team...but now it’s whatever you want.”

Too late, Fitz seemed to realise the horror that had spread on May’s, Bobbi’s and Maria’s face and the fire in Natasha’s eyes as soon as he’d stopped talking. 

“Coulson?” Natasha said, dangerously sweet. “I haven’t seen him for years.”   
Fitz swallowed and nervously glanced around, “I-I, um -”   
“Go on.” Natasha continued, taking a step towards the Scot. Sharon, Maria, May and Bobbi tensed. 

“Nat.” May warned. 

“You know it’s funny.” Natasha said, voice light, despite the muscle feathering in her jaw and her fists clenched at her side. “Because the last time I saw Coulson was three years ago at the Battle of New York. Just before it really. I don’t know if you’ve heard, but he was stabbed through the heart, so, you’re gonna have to answer this question,  _ Agent,” _ Natasha's voice deepened to a snarl, “If the Coulson  _ I _ knew was  _ murdered,  _ then  _ who do you know?” _ _  
_ Fitz opened his mouth. 

Then closed it. 

“Natasha.” Came a voice, sounding tired and fearful and calm all at the same time. “That’s enough.”   
Natasha whirled around to face the owner of the voice and her lip trembled ever so slightly as she saw him standing in the doorway.

The Director of SHIELD closed the door behind him and took a step forward. “Hi, Nat.” He said quietly. 

Natasha took three steps forward as she stared at him. “Phil.” She whispered, staring at the man who’d been her SO since Bahrain had sent May to desk duty, the man who’d become a trusted friend, who knew about her history. The man who’d become like a father to her. 

Who’d she’d thought was dead.

And who, it seemed, had lied to her. 

He was staring at her.

Phil Coulson was staring at her.

And he was very much alive. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoopsies. Coulson, next time you die and are revived, it might be helpful to let people know beforehand, so this doesn't happen. Second of all, probably talk to your team and let them know what's going on and how you're going to let people know you're alive. 
> 
> Also, I know Jemma is more emotionally mature, but I find it very likely that she'd still fangirl over Sharon Carter, Natasha and Maria. I mean, come on, they're awesome (even if Jemma has briefly met Maria before in S1E20).
> 
> Next chapter has quite a bit of Nat angst (I'm sorryyyyy), but I hope you're excited to see them work together, once we get past said angst. 
> 
> Let me know your thoughts in the comments, thanks for reading! Xxxx.


	3. Chapter Three.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natasha discovers that Coulson's been alive for all these years...and isn't pleased.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much to everyone who has kudosed, commented or even just read this fic! It means so much to me, so thank you! 
> 
> Trigger Warning: Brief description of a panic attack. Stop reading when Nat enters the training room, and start reading when Maria enters the room! Also, there's a line in there that could be interpreted as su*cide or and su*cide attempt, so just keep your eyes out for that one. It's mentioned when Nat is yelling at Coulson when she's talking about the memorial service, you're safe to start reading again after the mention of the Barton family. 
> 
> For everyone who was excited to see Nat verbally murder Coulson then I hope this lives up to your expectations!  
> Enjoy! Xxxx

Natasha stared as a rush of emotions passed through her:   
Anger, sadness, confusion,  _ hurt. _

_ Why hadn’t he told her? He was alive and he hadn’t told her. _

“Natasha?” Phil said, softly. “Say something.”   
“You lied to me.” Natasha met his gaze without flinching and felt a rush of satisfaction at the fear flickering over his face. “How long?” She asked, quietly. “How long have you been lying to me for?” 

“Natasha -” 

“Answer the question.”   
Phil glanced around at the team, who were watching silently. “Maybe the rest of the team should leave. I feel like this is a conversation we should have alone.”   
Daisy made to get up, but Natasha said, “No.” And the girl froze. “No, they’re welcome to stay. I would’ve thought you’d agree. After all, what is it that you first told me when I joined SHIELD? Ah, yes; ‘Your team is your family, never lie to them, never hide things from them.’ Seems you really stuck to that, huh?” Natasha couldn’t say that she wasn’t satisfied when Coulson openly flinched at her venomous words. Natasha was shaking, her fists were clenched at her sides and she had long settled into ‘Widow’s Mode’.    
It was the mood she was in when she forgot  _ everything _ other than what the Red Room had taught her.

Her face was terrifying, focusing on her prey, her enemy, her green eyes were like flames, her jaw was clenched and her entire being radiated with the sense of Predator.

And Coulson seemed to realise it. 

The team had frozen completely. 

Only two people could snap her out of Widow’s Mode.

And neither of them were in the room. 

“How could you?” Natasha asked. “How  _ could  _ you, Phil? Did it ever cross your mind to let me know, to let  _ Barton  _ know? Or how about your  _ precious _ captain?” She spat, “We all thought you were  _ dead!” _ _  
_ Coulson opened his mouth.

_ “Don’t.”  _ Natasha snarled. “Don’t say that you’re  _ sorry.  _ We had a memorial service for you. All of SHIELD was there, I  _ grieved _ for you, Barton didn’t come out of his room for a  _ week, I had to sleep in the same room as him to make sure he didn’t do something stupid!  _ As for the others...well,” Natasha finished maliciously, “I’m sure they’d  _ love _ to hear it from you themselves that you’re alive.” 

Coulson flinched again, knowing that the ‘others’ that Natasha had mentioned were the Barton family. His beautiful nephew and niece and Laura Barton who’d patched them up after missions, who’d invited them round for Christmasses and Easters and other holidays. 

They thought he was dead.

A heavy weight settled on his shoulders.

What was worse was that he knew Natasha well enough to know that she wanted to cry, to scream, but was masking it with anger to keep her unbreakable mask in front of the younger agents. 

What was worse was he knew Natasha well enough to see the rapid blinking of her eyes to stop her tears falling.

And he hated being the cause of his first-spy-daughter’s pain. 

“Was there a reason?” Natasha’s furious questioning started up again and Phil tried not to recoil at the venom in her voice. “Was there a reason that you hid it from us? Was there an  _ actual  _ reason? Rebuilding SHIELD perhaps?”   
She knew, of course she knew. 

“Yeah, that does sound pretty rough, but I’m weighing out what would be worse; rebuilding an organisation or living with the fact that you blame  _ yourself  _ for your  _ mentor’s death?  _ Why don’t you ask Barton, hmm? You gonna tell him? Or can we not be trusted? Is that it?  _ What, _ Phil?”   
“It’s not like that.” Coulson whispered, his voice breaking slightly. 

“Then what is it?” Natasha’s volume matched his, her voice trembling.

Coulson hated that he couldn’t answer her, hated that he saw Natasha’s small nod of acceptance; like he was just another person to abandon her, to lie to her. 

“You know I thought the world of you, Phil.”   
The words came like a punch in the gut.

She wasn’t lying.

And Coulson wished he could take it back.

Take back the lies. 

“Now I don’t know what to think.”   
He almost doubled over in pain there and then. 

“I get not telling Tony and Steve, Bruce and Thor, I get that. But not me, not Barton?  _ Why?” _ _  
_ Coulson didn’t answer and Natasha’s voice rose in volume again, growing louder and more poisonous with every word,  _ “Are _ you ever going to tell them? Maybe not Tony, but Pepper who  _ grieved _ over you? Had to take a few days off work after your  _ death?  _ You going to tell her? What about your  _ precious _ captain? Steve Rogers? You  _ do _ remember him, right? Or are you going to tell my daughter that her mother’s first family are the lying cheats that she thinks they are?”   
Each word was another punch to the gut, especially with the word ‘family’, but all Coulson could say was, “You have a daughter? I...I didn’t know.”   
Natasha’s eyes flicked over him, up and down and he’d never felt more bare than he was now; all laid out in front of her. Then her lips curved into a joyless smile and her voice was colder than ice as she said, “Well, I suppose you’d know that if you bothered to tell me that you were alive, wouldn’t you?”   
She let the words settle over him, glanced at him up and down again and left the room. 

Natasha fought to keep her breath steady as she strode down the corridor. She’d been taken to this particular base once or twice when she’d been training, so she vaguely knew her way around. 

Still shaking, she made her way to the gym area, where all of the training agents froze. The news that The Black Widow was here spread like wildfire and the agents were already collecting their stuff to give her the free space of the gym because when you see that The Black Widow wants something, you agree with absolutely everything she says. 

When the last agent was exiting the room, Natasha said in an emotionless voice. “Make sure no one comes in here. It’s occupied.”   
The younger agent fervently nodded and shut the door before making her way quickly down the corridor.

Once she was certain that she was alone, Natasha dropped her mask and slid down the door, resting her back against it. There, she covered her face with shaking hands and wept. 

She wasn’t sure how long she cried for, but once she was done, she got up and began attacking the punching bag, trying to take her anger out on it. 

Self-hatred suddenly washed through her - what she’d said to Coulson - 

Oh God, he hated her -  _ he hated her. _

Her breaths quickened and she couldn’t breathe - couldn’t breathe - oh  _ God -  _

Natasha squeezed herself into a gap between the benches on the side and wrapped her arms around her legs, burying her face into her arms. 

Her body was shaking and tears were streaming down her face and oh God - 

The door opened and she lifted shaky hands to wipe her tears, before saying, “It’s occupied.”

Natasha relaxed when Maria Hill slipped into the room. “Oh, Nat.” She said gently, closing the door behind her.

Natasha’s lip trembled. “He lied to me.”   
“I know.” Maria said, sliding next to Natasha. She wrapped an arm around Natasha’s shoulders and pressed a kiss to her hair. 

It only took seconds for Natasha to cling back to her. 

Coulson couldn’t stop staring at the door. He closed his eyes briefly and a lone tear slid down his face. 

“Sir?” Daisy asked quietly. 

Coulson didn’t answer, so May took charge, despite looking quite shaky herself. “Daisy, you and Sharon go find information about the Red Room and Yelena Belova. FitzSimmons, make sure we have everything ready for the mission. We’re going into unknown territory, so bring enough medication and weaponry. Mack, go with them and Bobbi and Hunter...rest up for now. You’ll need your strength. Agent Morse, it’s not up for discussion.” May said firmly, once Bobbi opened her mouth.

She closed it once more. 

“I-um,” Coulson rubbed at his face. “I’ll go talk to Natasha -”   
“Don’t.” Maria spoke up. Her words weren’t harsh, but they still felt like daggers to Coulson. “She won’t want to see you right now. I’ll go.” 

“Right. No, of course. I think I’ll -”   
“I need to talk to you in your office.” May spoke firmly. “Sharon, you’re in charge.” 

The blonde nodded and gestured for Daisy to follow her and the rest of the team sprung into action, trying to empty the room as quickly as they could. 

Once the rest of the team had left, May took Coulson’s arm and gently led him towards his office where she locked the door and sat Coulson down on the sofa. “Hey.” She finally said softly. “Are you okay?”   
Coulson didn’t answer, so May let him squeeze her hand and cry as much as he needed to. 

Some part of Natasha wanted to push away from Maria, to wipe her tears, get up and start again. Widows didn’t cry.

Natalia Romanova, top graduate of the Red Room program, ex-KGB assassin, SHIELD agent and avenger did not cry. 

Coulson wasn’t the first to lie to her.

And she was pretty sure that he wouldn’t be the last.

But a heavy weight was in her chest and all she could do was cry. 

Maria held her tightly, pressing kisses onto her hair while Natasha buried her face into her friend’s chest.    
“I’m sorry.” She gasped out. 

“Hey, hey, hey. You have nothing to be sorry for.”

“He hates me, doesn’t he?” Natasha whispered, feeling pathetic as her voice trembled. 

“No, don’t be silly. He could never hate you.” Maria answered, tucking a lock of Natasha’s red hair behind her ear. 

“What I said to him -”.   
“Nat.” Maria placed her hands on Natasha’s shoulders and met her eyes. “You’re angry. You’re allowed to be angry. You thought he was  _ dead _ for  _ three years. _ Be mad all you want. I’d understand if you were mad at me, but that’s  _ okay.” _

“You knew too?” 

“I -” Maria bit her lip, then nodded. “Yeah.”

Natasha gave a small nod. “But, why? He had so many chances to tell me - so did you - why didn’t he tell me? Why didn’t  _ you _ tell me?” 

“Secrecy.” Maria finally answered. “Fury didn’t tell everyone exactly what happened. He didn’t tell everyone, Nat.”   
Natasha looked up at Maria and her eyes glistened with tears as she said, “But I’m not just anyone, Maria. You know that.”    
Maria bit her lip again and let out a small sigh. “I do know.” She whispered, her throat becoming tight. “I should’ve told you.” Maria didn’t apologise - that wasn’t what Natasha wanted to hear. ‘Sorrys’ only meant so much when you’ve been trained as an assassin from birth and the trainers made excuses; ‘Sorry for taking you as a child’, ‘Sorry for turning you into a killer’. 

“Yeah, you should’ve. But it was Coulson who I thought was dead, not you.”

Maria let out a relieved sigh, “So, you’re not mad at me?”   
“I’m more mad at Coulson.” Natasha admitted. “I just -” She rubbed at her face, “I mean, you know how it was; us, Barton, May, Fury and Coulson, we were like a family...and then Fury, May and you...you knew he was alive and didn’t tell us.” 

“I should’ve.” Maria repeated. 

Natasha raised an eyebrow, some of her old humour showing through,  _ “Yeah.  _ You should’ve. But, let’s not focus on that. Let’s focus on finding my sister.”   
“You sure you’re okay?” Maria checked. 

“What answer would you like? The real one or the fake one?”   
Maria raised an eyebrow at the woman who was like a sister to her. “Whichever. It’s just you and me.” 

Natasha’s joking exterior evaporated. “Sorry.” She muttered as tears began to fall - Maria cared for her so much, but  _ why? _ Why would anyone care for  _ her? _ She didn’t deserve it. She was a murderer, an assassin, a bad person.

Yet, Maria wrapped her arms around Natasha and let her cry. 

Daisy would be lying if she said that she wasn’t slightly nervous to go and talk to Ms Romanoff. Her outburst at Coulson - while justified, if she was being honest - had been utterly terrifying. And the way she looked at Coulson - like a little girl looking at her father - had made Daisy’s heart clench. 

_ You know I thought the world of you, Phil. _

_ Now I don’t know what to think. _

Daisy had felt sick at the venom in The Black Widow’s voice, and by the varying faces of fear and shock on her teammates’ faces, she hadn’t been the only one. 

She knocked hesitantly on the door to the gym. “Ms Hill, Ms Romanoff, it’s Agent Johnson. I think we might have an update.”   
On the other side of the door, Maria and Natasha exchanged a heavy glance, then Maria called out. “Come in.”   
Daisy pushed open the door; the two women stood in front of her.

Daisy could tell by the closeness that Maria was standing next to the Widow and the faint tear-streaks on Natasha’s face that Coulson’s-not-really-death was having a bigger effect on Natasha than she would’ve thought. 

“Good news and bad news.” She started, trying not to feel intimidated in front of some of SHIELD’s legends. “Good news; Yelena Belova is alive.”   
Natasha let out a barely audible sigh of a relief, “And the bad news?”   
“She’s not the only one.” Daisy showed them the news she’d transferred onto an Ipad. Maria took the Ipad as Daisy went on. “She’s one out of - roughly - fifteen others. I don’t have the full details of a base, but they do have one. Based on online rumours; I think they’re reporting back to someone.” She gave Natasha a side-long questioning glance. “Do you have any ideas of who?” 

Natasha didn’t answer straight away and Daisy was about to repeat the question, when Natasha said, “Yes.” She strode off purposefully, her bag still clutched around her shoulder. Daisy’s mouth was open slightly and she ran after her. “Are you going to share that with us?”

Natasha’s green gaze turned on her fully and Daisy tried not to step back. “Set the coordinates for Moscow, Daisy Johnson. I’ll brief the team then.” Natasha hurried ahead again.

“Right. Okay, then.” Daisy stared after Natasha’s retreating figure. “I’ll get right to that, then. You do...whatever you’re doing.” She yelled after Natasha, her voice trailing off slightly. She turned to Maria Hill, who’d come up beside her. “Does she do that often?” Maria chuckled lightly and walked after her friend. “Or it’s just a SHIELD thing. What, you get to a certain level of fame and don’t have to listen to anyone else. Fine, that’s…” Daisy huffed and made her way to let Coulson know that they were ready. 

“Russia, here we come.” She muttered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're finally getting somewhere! Off to Russia we gooooo!! Also Maria Hill is so underrated in canon, so here's my love letter to her ig - also love to Sharon Carter too, because those two are wildly underrated and if Sharon ends up being a love intrest in The Falcon and Winter Soldier, I may cry. 
> 
> I hope you guys enjoyed the father-daughter relationship with Nat and Coulson, and the sister-sister relationshp of Nat and Maria. It's never really confirmed what they are to each other, so this is my interpretation of that.  
> I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Thank you for reading!! Xxx.


	4. Chapter Four.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> En route to Russia, the team discuss the mission (with some arguments from Natasha and Hunter) and FitzSimmons and Mack get some training.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who has read, kudosed and commented! It means so much! 
> 
> Trigger Warning: Implied r@pe and abuse. Stop reading after Mack says 'Well that's reassuring'. Unfortunately this does go on until the end of the chapter, so I'm really sorry for that! However, you don't miss much, just Nat talking a little bit about her past.

On the Zephyr One, Natasha stood on one side of the room, screens behind her, mapping out various spots in Moscow and images of children - now Red Room assassins. Coulson and the rest of the team stood in front of her. 

“This,” Natasha pointed to a crumbling building. “Is the Red Room where I spent most of my time. Aka, the Red Room that trains the Black Widows. Aka, the Red Room that I grew up in. Twenty years ago, a bomb went off and the entire building collapsed.” Maria Hill shifted, so she could stand closer to her friend, if need be. Natasha released a long breath. “Um, I was...eighteen, my sister was sixteen and I was outside, on target practice and my sister, Yelena, was sent to get some daggers to train with too and she hadn’t come out for a while, so I was about to go and get her, when the bomb went off and the entire building collapsed.” Natasha was clearly having trouble keeping her stony exterior. Maria’s hand reached for hers underneath the table and Natasha squeezed it. “I thought my sister was dead. But I put a movement tracker on one of the bricks that would react when it came into contact with this.” Natasha held up her wrist to show violent scarring and Coulson sucked in a breath slightly. “We get put a chip in our wrists, when we’re taken in. I took mine out. Well, SHIELD did.” Gesturing to the scarring, Natasha managed a small smile that didn’t reach her eyes. “Would not recommend. Hurts like hell. There’s a lot of bleeding and...scars, as you can see. Anyway,” Natashas eyes glistened. “I searched for three hours for my sister, before Barton found me and took me into SHIELD. He was meant to kill me.” Natasha tilted her head slightly, swallowing hard. “He made a different choice.” Natasha cleared her throat and shook herself, as if to shake away the moment of weakness. “Our mission is to go in and get Yelena and any other members of the Red Room to safety. Any questions?”

The team shifted on their feet nervously. 

“Are you sure this is a good idea?” Hunter asked. “They’re assassins, Nat -” Natasha bristled at the nickname “And that means they’re dangerous. Are you sure that this is a good idea?” He repeated.   
Natasha scoffed.  _ “Dangerous? _ Every SHIELD mission is dangerous, Hunter. Don’t back out now.” 

“I’m not.” Hunter looked affronted. “I’m just saying that maybe we should plan a bit more instead of going in guns blazing.”   
“What do you want me to do? Call ahead?” 

Hunter stared at Natasha, looking very annoyed. “Would you?” He deadpanned. “Yeah, let them know if you could. That would be  _ so _ helpful.”

Natasha huffed. “No, seriously, Hunter, what do you want me to do?”

“I want you to take this seriously!”   
_ “Seriously? _ This was a  _ joke?”  _ Natasha gestured to her scarred wrist. “You are unbelievable.” 

“Because going to rescue your sister from a group of assassins is?”   
Natasha tilted her head, “Because finding out that your teammate can manipulate vibrations is a usual occurrence?”

They sounded like they were joking, which is what they normally sounded like in a conversation together and Bobbi sighed deeply, but Coulson could tell that Natasha was getting angry. 

“You don’t have to come, but she’s my  _ sister _ . I’m not leaving her behind again.” 

“Nat -” Catching sight of Natasha's annoyance, Hunter tried again “- tasha. No one is saying that we’ll let you go in alone, but we don’t know the place like you do and you need to give us more information.”   
Natasha paused, then said, releasing a long breath of air, “You’re right. I’m sorry.” Natasha turned to the screen again and pointed at a woman with thick brown hair and piercing - almost unnatural - blue eyes. “This is Arisha. She’s one of the Red Room leaders and overlooks the Black Widow training program. If my sister didn’t die in the blast, it’s very likely she didn’t either and with the information that Agent Johnson provided me with, I believe she’s trying to start up the program again.”   
“Why does she need your sister?” Mack asked. “Is she being trained from scratch?”   
Natasha’s brows knitted together, then cleared. “The Black Widow is the nickname SHIELD gave to me, but I’m not the only Black Widow.” She explained, “My sister is one and my mother is one. Most of the girls at the Red Room are.”   
“And you think that this...this Arisha is the one controlling the survivors?” Mack checked and Natasha nodded. She was silent, before she said rather hesitantly. “If anyone wants extra combat training, I can help. I’d recommend Fitz and Simmons first as I’m assuming everyone else at least has some combat training?” 

Coulson nodded. “FitzSimmons have the least combat training, but I’d appreciate it if you could teach all of us tactics of the Red Room.”   
Natasha met his gaze and held it for a few seconds, then nodded. “Maria knows a few of their moves. She and I would often go through them together when we were younger. May knows them too and Sharon probably has a few tricks.”   
Maria, Sharon and May nodded. “FitzSimmons and Mack you’re with me.” Natasha began. “I’ll see what I can do. Mack, especially, use your weight and size to your advantage. FitzSimmons, you guys can use your speed and your size. May, take Bobbi and Hunter. Sharon, you take Daisy and Maria, take Coulson. We’ll reconvene in four hours.” Natasha beckoned to FitzSimmons and Mack with a jerk of her head, then swept towards the small training area in the Zephy’s gym. `

Jemma followed Natasha to the gym area of the Zephyr with Mack and Fitz. “I’m sorry.” She found herself saying. 

Natasha tensed and Mack and Fitz whipped their gazes to her. “About Coulson.” Jemma continued. “He should’ve told you. It wasn’t fair.”   
“Life isn’t fair.” Natasha answered. “It doesn’t matter, anyway.”   
For some reason, Jemma kept talking, “You were upset. If there’s anything I can do, let me know.” 

Natasha turned to face her fully and Jemma tried not to step back under her stare. “Thank you.” She said eventually. “That’s...kind of you.” 

Jemma sent her a small smile, then fell silent. 

When they arrived at the gym, Natasha said to Jemma, “Put your hair down.”   
“Pardon?” Jemma asked politely. 

“Hair down.” Natasha repeated. “If you get in a fight, your enemies won’t wait for you to put your hair up.”   
Jemma fingered her tied-up hair. “But...I won’t be in the field. I’m not a field agent.”   
Natasha raised an eyebrow, “You think the Red Room will care that you're not a field agent? I learnt how to fight in  _ heels _ when I was  _ twelve _ . So, hair down.”

Jemma felt Fitz’s hand brush her arm and she could see that Mack was about to say something, but before he could do so, Jemma said, “Okay. Hair down.” She held out her hairband to the Widow as if to prove it and Natasha gave her a nod of approval. If Jemma was being honest, she felt bad for Natasha and, while he meant well, she didn’t want Mack to have a go at the woman. 

As a younger agent in the academy, she’d always idolised the female heroes of SHIELD - Natasha included - and had read up any and all information that she could on them. Though not much was written about it, Jemma had a vague idea of what the Red Room did to young girls and she also knew that Natasha, Maria Hill, Clint Barton, Coulson, May and Fury had been close; Finding out that Coulson had lied to her about his death must’ve been devastating. 

“Agent Mackenzie.” Natasha said. “Come forward.” Mack did so and Natasha stood next to him on the training mat, though left a significant amount of distance. 

Without warning, she ran and jumped onto Mack, latching her legs around his neck. Fitz flinched and stared wide-eyed. 

Mack, caught unawares, tried to flip her off his neck, but Natasha seemed to alter the weight of her body and flipped with him. 

Mack thudded against the mat with a groan and Natasha was on top of him with a hand gently pressed against his throat in seconds. 

Natasha stared down at Mack for a few more seconds before releasing him and turning to FitzSimmons. “Okay. What did he do wrong?”   
“Take on you.” Fitz muttered and Jemma’s lips twitched. She thought she might’ve seen a flicker of humour across Natasha’s face, but it was gone so quickly that she couldn’t be sure. 

“What he did was underestimate me.” Natasha said, helping Mack up who, up until now, had been on the floor, nursing his back. “That is the worst thing that you could ever do to an opponent.”   
“That’s a little harsh.” Mack muttered, a hand rubbing his back. 

Natasha turned to face him. “Is it? You assumed that getting me off your neck would make you the winner. It’s a start, but against someone who wanted to kill you? You’d be dead.” 

“Well that’s reassuring.” Mack said. 

“This isn’t a  _ joke.” _ Natasha appeared to finally lose her temper. “Do you know what they do to people who they capture?” No one answered.  _ “Do you?”  _ Natasha’s leg bounced slightly and she closed her eyes before opening them and saying in a quiet, but firm voice, “You are  _ lucky _ if you have a quick death with them. They do unspeakable things to people and my sister has been with them for almost all of her life!” Her voice rose and Fitz’s hand wrapped around Jemma’s wrist, ready to pull her behind him if need be. “They take you and they make you into something that you’re not. T-they kill, they torture, they…” Natasha trailed off and pain flashed across her eyes. She swallowed hard. “They do things that  _ no one  _ should ever have to go through. Ever.”   
Jemma’s mouth opened and closed as she realised what Natasha was talking about. “How old?” She whispered, feeling sick.

Natasha met her gaze and she said, voice full of hate, “Young enough.” She turned to Mack and Fitz and said in a hard voice. “So, like I was saying; Never underestimate your enemy. Ever.” Her lip curled. “Agent Mackenzie; What did you do wrong?”   
Mack’s gaze was horrified. “I-I’m sorry.”

Natasha’s lip trembled and she looked away for a second, blinking rapidly, then jerked her head towards the mat. “Again.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed the chapter! Natasha and Jemma are feeling like a massive BrOtp for me, not entirely sure why if we're being honest, but I think they have the same sort of guilt complex as each other. I'm sorry if Mack was slightly out-of-character. I don't often write him, so I apologies if it was OOC.  
> I really hope you enjoyed the Hunter-Natasha banter too! I like to think that they would've known each other when he and Bobbi were dating. 
> 
> Next chapter, we arrive in Russia, and the agents meet members of the Red Room...


End file.
